We’ve known each other for two days now so I think we can be honest:
Most of us do not like that all the Christmas stuff starts so early. Our emotions seem to range from mild annoyance leading to a feeling of superiority at the kind of people who are actually going to buy Christmas lights in September, to a deep feeling of hurt that the larger North American (yeah, I’m talking to you, too, Canada) culture has strayed so far from the celebration of the birth of Christ that the tacky Christmas stuff is now out right next to Halloween candy.
And yet, here we are on this website, specifically talking about Christmas when it’s still three months away. It’s not religiously correct, nor does it make a lot of sense for secular Christmas celebrators, either.
Hypocrisy? Cognitive dissonance? Or a welcome forum to discuss things we notice and think about that would annoy our friends if we tried to talk about them at a bar or on Facebook or at work? I really hope it’s the third option.
Whatever it is, though, I’m going to claim the right for anyone reading or posting at Christmased.com to complain about things starting too early even if we’re commenting on it equally early. In other words: Get off our lawn!
I’m thinking that evenutally the Christmas stuff will be available in stores year round, and there will just be “seasonal” sections of stores for all the holidays. I know that places like Walmart have that now, but I see it more like a permanent section, like part of housewares.
@SuperwomanWannabe, I totally thought you were going to say there was going to be a “seasonal” section for everything else that isn’t Christmas-related.
You know what I miss? The anticipation of Christmas. There was nothing better as a kid than looking forward to the Xmas specials on TV (Rudolph & the Island of Misfit toys!), counting down the weeks (in DECEMBER, not SEPTEMBER) on the advent wreath in church, and decorating the house. Also in December. This year-round thing is ruining it, in my opinion.
And yet, I always find myself feeling crabby when I have to buy presents in December and there are 8,000 other people in the mall, the store, the parking lot, the internet. So I started doing my shopping in November, which doesn’t feel very Xmas-y, but allows me to avoid the stress of holiday shopping. Which, come to think of it, means I need to start thinking about what I’m getting everyone this year. Sigh. (I hate giving unwanted/unneeded things… even if my family doesn’t believe it, I’ve learned that the less crap/clutter I have, the happier I am. So I feel guilty for giving presents that add to people’s crap/clutter. I want to buy people things they genuinely want and need.)
Gah. Christmas. Why must you be so stressful?
My kids are still little enough that Christmas isn’t that big a deal (yet), and our families have never been of the ZILLIONS OF PREZENTZ school, so those expectations aren’t too high… But.
Christmas isn’t a religious holiday for me, but it is for my husband’s family.. and yet, they celebrate the religious part differently from what I’m used to. My mother’s family was Catholic, and so we acknowledge Christmas up til Twelfth Night.. and my ILs barely know what that is. Drives me nuts.
Need I add that we’re still developing our traditions?
My mother-in-law works at a school. Consequently, she gets a lot of small presents from a lot of people (mugs, candles, candy, etc). I always buy her gift certificates for pedicures. Who doesn’t want a pedicure in January or February even when no one will be seeing your feet for 4 more months? She loves that I do not add to the crap-load at her house. It’s one of the few things she likes about me.
My mother and step-father are retired and go out to eat several times a week. Last year, I got them a huge box of meat (steaks, chops, etc) and gift cards to a few area restaurants (and coupons for those restaurants to make their cards go farther). They were both very appreciative of the edibles.
I totally relate to the gift card v. crap-load conundrum and land firmly on the gift card side. My first Christmas with the soon-to-be-in-laws in Atlanta was a real eye-opener. My boyfriend and I flew out from the SF Bay Area and stayed at a hotel while we celebrated Christmas Eve and Day at his sister’s house. I could not believe the mountain of stuff that accumulated and then erupted in a flurry of unwrapping within a matter of minutes. We got so much STUFF that we couldn’t pack it and had to leave half of it at the hotel room. (It wasn’t worth packing and mailing!)
At our wedding, I wanted to ask only for gift cards because I didn’t want to bother with a registry and we lived in a small apartment so we didn’t have room for much. However, my mother-in-law pitched such a fit about the lack of registry that I ultimately relented and we did end up with some serious crap (purchased at our stores of choice but not listed on the registry…huh?).
Many years ago, I used to work at a department store, in the seasonal department, setting up Christmas trees. We typically started getting them out and decorating them mid to late July. I have heard it ALL about how “it’s too early for this”. Retail is trying to get you in the spending mood for Christmas – that’s what it is.
I, however, embrace Christmas. I listened to some Christmas songs on my computer today. I have dressed up as a Christmas tree for Halloween not once, but TWICE. What better way to combine the two holidays?
I am SO with Erin about this. I miss the anticipation. But the problem is that for there to be anticipation someone has to be doing all the fun stuff that gets anticipated. And that person is me. Well, my husband does the tree and some decorating, but the present buying, most decorating, baking, advent calendar-ing… that ‘s all me. And getting it all out of the way ahead of time helps make me feel a little better about enjoying December. Which is one of the reasons I want to be more organized, so I can successfully enjoy December without losing stuff and having to rebuy it.
I’m not sure if this is a blanket statement I can safely make, but I’m going to throw it out there – are the primary Christmas planners in each family really the ones who are upset about decorations in Costco in September? I feel like there might be a higher percentage of single or non-primary planners who are the ones who are all “OH GOD MY EYES, I HAVE TO SEE A DISPLAY OF CARDS ALREADY!” I also might have pulled that thought out of my butt, so take it as you will. My only actual annoyance is when they start piping in Christmas music before Thanksgiving, because it’s so ubiquitous every season I hate starting to get bored with it by 12/15.
@Leah – you are so right about us having to create the anticipation. I am realizing that now as a new mom, and as a person married to someone who just doesn’t see the point in making a big deal about holidays, birthdays, etc. So if I don’t do it, it’s not going to get done, and there won’t be that kind of magic for our toddler. Which is not cool with me
So we’re trying to forge our own traditions that will be enjoyable but not crazy-making.
My husband and his family are Eastern Orthodox which means they don’t celebrate Christmas until January. I grew up with a living Christmas tree (root ball and everything) which can’t stay in the dry house too long without dying, so I’m not used to having a Christmas tree up for an extended period of time, let alone leaving it up past December 26th, 27th AT THE LATEST. So we’re wrangling how to deal with different dates and my stress level, especially now that we have a kid.
I really dislike the commercialized “buy Christmas NOW NOW NOW” thing going on, especially as it makes OUR Christmas drag out even longer, but this year I’m giving myself permission to shop way ahead of Christmas to get stuff on sale that we know we want. I’m already almost done with the toddler’s shopping and it’s nice that I won’t have to worry about it later or do last minute budgeting/money juggling.
I grew up with a live tree too, but it turns out I’m allergic to pine trees and more importantly, my 7 year old is violently allergic to pine trees, so we have a fake tree now and I can’t believe how much I love it. Seriously, I LOVE it. We’ll put it up the weekend after Thanksgiving (vacationing in early Dec, want to get it up before we leave), we’ll have the lights on a timer while we’re away, so our house will look Christmasy, and then we’ll take it down at the beginning of January. No mess, no water, and it looks real enough to fool almost anyone.
+1 for fake tree! That’s all we had when I was a kid, and I used to declare that when I had MY OWN HOUSE, I’d have a real live tree, because fake is so lame, blah blah blah.
We got a real tree one year, and are STILL finding pine needles in the living room. Plus my fear of it getting set on fire, and the enormous mess to get it out of the house.
Now we’re back to fake tree bliss, and I couldn’t be happier. Seems like a crime, living in the Northwest, but it’s so much easier to deal with, and we can put it up early and enjoy it for as long as we like.
I love Christmas, but you know what? It’s just not the same when your MIL asks where you will “be” for Christmas Day in the middle of July. Because it means that you have to have had that conversation with your other half by the end of May so that you can drill it into him that this year, yes damnit, I want to be with my folks. Which means that you then spend the second half of the year feeling guilty that you won’t be with the outlaws, and end up not enjoying Christmas Day, so you may as well have spent it with the old hag anyway. Sigh.
Yikes, that’s awful.
Berty – my mother decided after YEARS of going to her in-laws for Christmas to NEVER have our Christmas ON Christmas again, once her kids started getting married (my 3 brothers got married the same year, how convenient!). She picks a time within 2 weeks either way of Christmas, makes sure it’s convenient for nearly everyone (which gets harder every year, as the grandkids get older and married, too!), and sets that date.
That is so sensible! As we’re not religious (and neither are the inlaws) it’s not like we are ‘limited’ to one specific date in the diary. But my inlaws are a very tight knit family who have very fixed traditions and woe betide anyone who dares question them! Doesn’t stop me loving Christmas though!!
Berty, I think you win. Which isn’t good, in this case.
I think my idea of when Christmas things should start appearing in stores (or start appearing in general) is frozen in time. Which, in my case, would be the 70′s (or 80′s perhaps). For me, all is fair game after Halloween (in Canada, so our Thanksgiving is before Halloween). In October, I want to see things relating to Thanksgiving and Halloween. But come Nov 1st, I’m OK with seeing Xmas stuff in stores. It used to be like that.
Also, it’s hard for me not to link Christmas to weather. As in, once it starts snowing, it feels like Xmas. This, of course, is a problem for retailers (and to be honest, a problem for people who like to do crafts etc. for Xmas but aren’t motivated if the weather doesn’t feel like Xmas). Obviously, for warmer climates, this is not an issue. But Christmasy weather definitely influences shopping outcomes.
And, finally, working in retail/merchandising/product means that I’m already thinking of Xmas way before the end of October. However, I do keep ‘work Xmas’ and ‘home Xmas’ (which are pretty different anyhow) fairly separate.
OMG Yes, re: working in retail. The one year I worked in retail and we were talking nonstop about Christmas/holidays starting in August/September, it nearly drove me crazy. By the time real Christmas came along, I was so, so tired of it.
I don’t know if this happens in America but here in the UK I have seen Easter eggs in the shops alongside half price Advent calendars at the start of January. Now that does confuse me!
I like thinking about the Christmas holidays now because prices are lower and things are still in stock. I subscribe to the 100 Days of Christmas Blog (this week: thinking about Christmas cards and other ideas for holiday correspondence) and the Holiday Grand Plan (which I could do year-round and quit my job and still not complete, but it does remind me of some things to do around my house to prepare). I also like those because it’s not “just” Christmas but also gentle reminders that Oct. 15 really isn’t too early to put up Halloween stuff, even if it is still 80 and humid in those years that the weather plays tricks on us.
I’m typing this where I can see the hooks that our green-and-red paper chains will go and am excited that the season is almost here again. I like these forums b/c they help me do the things I mean to do to make it special for and with my family. Thanks in advance, all, and good luck in the prepping!
I love love love Christmas! Although I grew up Christian, I am mostly agnostic now so our celebration is primarily secular. To be honest, I haven’t seen too much Christmas stuff out yet. And anything after Halloween is totally fine with me.
I love setting our own traditions with the kids. The annual trip to the candy factory to buy candy “coal” for daddy’s stocking, the lights, the new jammies on Christmas Eve, the making goodies for friends/neighbors. And yes, making the red/green paper chains.
My rule is we do NOT travel for Christmas and Christmas morning is spent at home in our jammies.
Growing up my extended family only gave presents to kids, not adults. Which is an idea that I can get behind. My husband’s family is like this too but his stepfamily is odd. I try not to be ungrateful but I don’t freaking want a gift card to Applebee’s (BLECH!) and think it is silly to even have to do this anyway with grown adults. We do usually have a nice family photo taken to give to the grandparents.
Pingback: Light magic | Christmased!
Geez, this is all stressing me out already. The endless, excessive hours spent planning, shopping, wrapping, decorating, undecorating, baking, cooking. Deciding who, where, and when extended family celebrations will be. Dealing with everyone’s expectations. It has all become too much.
Hii all. I agree with you – 100% +. Thank you for the information. Mike.